GYG
Three simple words and, perhaps, one of the hardest concepts to follow. I can attest to this firsthand.
In the last month, I got married, moved TWICE, left a job I loved, and started a job I'm truly thankful to have. It has been a whirlwind and has totally thrown me off my normal routine. I typically go to the gym 5-6 days a week, have a strict weightlifting routine, and a clean eating regimen. I thrive on keeping my schedule and feeling in control.
Well, that has all gone out the window for the last several weeks as my life has been anything but routine. My family came in town for the wedding which meant morning coffee and eating out. After the wedding, I was in my apartment for 2 days before I moved into my husband's place, so, of course, I didn't buy groceries.
After moving into my husband's place, I met up with friends before I moved, had school parties and functions, lived out of boxes, and had pure exhaustion from all the festivities. My gym activity was subpar, at best, but I did do my best to get there. I tried so hard to make it work, but my body was shutting down and I needed rest. I rested and also struggled with guilt. It was as if all the hard work (my fitness journey started 4 years ago) would somehow vanish because I wasn't "keeping my schedule."
It's taken a lot of work to get to where I am - someone who loves the gym and whose mind and body has strengthened since starting to move my body and eat better. I get frustrated with myself when I have a tough lifting session, if I don't "improve" from my last lift. If I'm not growing or going up in reps or my level of strength, I feel like I'm failing. It's an unrealistic expectation that does not make room for life and its happenings - like that time when I injured my back and could not lift for MONTHS. I fought my way back, though.
It became clear that I had to surrender to what was happening in my life. I was so tired from running around the last few months that I felt zapped of energy. To be honest, I still feel like that. We are still settling into our place and I'm still making my way through boxes. My new job is going to be amazing and it will also stretch me (for which I am hungry and ready). I want to be my best and that means resting and not stressing over an obstructed gym routine or anything else for that matter.
No, I haven't cooked much in the last month. No, I haven't been to the gym as much as I would have liked to go or burned the amount of calories that I usually do. Instead, I'm spending time with my husband and getting used to my new surroundings. I'm keeping in touch with my family and friends. I'm working to make my house a home. I'm also committing to my best at my job about which I'm passionate.
I'm maintaining. I'm human. I'm giving myself grace because that's what I need to do right now. I'll get back into my routine (that took time to build in the first place). I'll get back to my eating regimen (which I'm reconsidering since there is such a thing as too strict). I'll get there because I've done it before. I can't control that my life has been topsy turvy in all the best ways.
If you're in a place where you're "missing the mark" and not performing like you are used to performing, give yourself grace. Check in with yourself and honor your mind, heart, and body. It's okay to take a break and it's okay to get knocked off your rhythm. In fact, let's learn to welcome these times as they are what make us normal and remind us of our humanness. There are things outside of what our hands can hold. It's okay. We can recover and we can get back in the saddle.
For now, I'm doing what I can and will keep doing that until I establish my routine again. While I had a good one, I have to make another because that's just where I am. In the meantime, I'll be over here unpacking (still) , probably eating chips, drinking coffee, and heading to the gym when I finally figure out when it's actually open.
Take good care of yourselves, friends,
Courtney xoxo